That's it, I think I can die now a happy man. After 28.9 years on this earth I can shuffle off to my grave knowing I have truly achieved all I set out to do, for on Wednesday evening I shook the hand of none other than Mr David Hasselhoff. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the work of this living legend – 'the Hoff', let's just say he's touched many lives in his time on screen and with his inspirational music has even helped to bring down the Berlin Wall and reunite East and West Germany. As my colleague Dave Neal opined when he realised he would not be able to attend – "I can't believe it, it'll be like meeting Jesus!" And so it was, kinda.

The select band of journalists invited to attend this rooftop Soho soiree with the Hoffmeister-general were done so by the wonderful internet service provider Pipex, one of the most brilliant ISPs around in my book, and I've always thought so. They've certainly thrown down the gauntlet to others in the space... perhaps Bulldog could sign up Mr T, or Thus may wish to secure the services of Lee Majors.

To be honest, I've always been a bit cynical of celebrities endorsing enterprise IT products and services (see my May 24 post). The juxtaposition of Hollywood razzmattaz and IT mundanity is just too incongruous a partnership to work... in most cases. Somehow though there's something universally appealing about DH that seems to make even the most world-weary hack sit up and take notice. Maybe it's that cheeky grin, or that perfectly coiffured mullet, or maybe not. Anyway, cheers Pipex, and I'll be all ears next time you tell me about broadband services and contention ratios, for a small part of my brain will be simultaneously replaying the Knight Rider theme tune.

June 29, 2006 in Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (3)

Went to see my brother and the rest of our family in Edinburgh last weekend, which was predictably traumatic. No, not because my father likes dressing up in women's clothes when he's drunk and parading around in front of his family – we've all come to terms with that. And it's not because my darling nephews like to play an endearing little game called "throw things at Uncle Phil's head until he bleeds", and it's not that I found myself in the centre of Edinburgh at 1am in an England football top. Amazing how hard it is to get a taxi sometimes. Don't think I gloated too much about England's overwhelming sporting, economic and cultural superiority.

And it wasn't because the train back from bonnie Scotland took roughly seven hours, though it was a joy to return to London not by the usual East coast route, but via such hidden gems as Kettering, Derby and Loughborough. No, the trauma was all about fielding the daily gamut of IT-related questions from my family, as if I'm suddenly some kind of expert.

Actually I'm the last person who could help – it's my bro who's built his own PC, installed his own Wi-Fi network and is now probably working on a datacentre in his garage. He represents the dictionary definition of enthusiastic amateur, but in my world, theory and practice are sadly worlds apart – I might talk to IT vendors and analysts five days a week but hands-on skills definitely ain't my bag.

In a lot of ways my brother is a great example of how IT-literate the white-collar worker of the 21st century has become, and has had to become. As we keep hearing in IT security circles, the biggest risks usually come from the human factor, the one thing you can't automate, the office worker who leaves his password on a Post-It note on his desk. But there is hope, and this trend could see the IT chief's job becoming a bit easier, as a new generation of IT-savvy graduates find their way into the world of work.

June 29, 2006 in Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (1)

Another day another conference centre, this one a glorified giant shed perched out in the middle of nowhere, or "London's up-and-coming Docklands district", as I believe the property industry likes to call it. Here the minutiae of the cringeworthy conference circuit comes to life - an Alan Partridge tableau replete with characters from private enterprise, vendor and research communities... and TV's Nick Ross. The turnout for the Inbox/Outbox expo wasn't great, which was no great surprise given the location. I could have lain across four seats during the presentations, but I don't think Nick would have appreciated that. The PA announcer, no doubt spotting the countless numbers of empty seats, grew ever more desperate as the time for NR's big moment - a grand finale live panel debate - grew ever closer.

A request to "make your way to the main auditorium to catch the live panel debate" slowly turned into a desperate demand, as the clock ticked down, repeated at minute intervals with the air of a woman whose job clearly depended on it. Listen love, I thought, if Mr Crimewatch UK himself can't pull 'em in, you're certainly not going to make an impact. Maybe it was the fact that Sue "take that fag out of your mouth while I'm talking to you" Cook sadly couldn't make it. Or maybe not. Either way I noted her no-show in my feedback form for the event, so maybe we'll have better luck next year.

For those of you that couldn't make it, of whom there were an enormous number, there were some interesting speakers, if you could hear them over the constant drone of aircraft rattling the tin roof overhead. Sessions covering educating employees in good email usage, the benefits of email outsourcing, and data privacy developments all drew tens of interested IT professionals. And then there was spam. According to Spamhaus CIO Richard Cox, the NHTCU (now part of the Serious Organised Crime Agency) is the only organisation with the knowledge and resources available to effectively deal with the problem of UK spammers, but it has consistently ignored the issue.

"We've been in contact with the NHTCU for some time to [try] and make them see the problem because it [represents] a threat to ecommerce and the critical national infrastructure, but [they] don't want to deal with the issue," he complained. But don't fear, all you spam-fearing IT chiefs out there. Quick as a flash Ross jumped in with some fighting talk, promising to leverage his contacts in the papers to spark up a Daily Mail campaign on the issue. I'm presuming, therefore, that illegal immigrants and gypsies will be found to be the root causes of spam in the UK.

June 23, 2006 in Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (1)

At a recent IT security event I arrived too early and had to go a few times round the block, sat through several hours of sometimes relevant infosecurity presentations and had to hot-foot it back to the office before they cracked open the booze. So a fairly run-of-the-mill event then. There were a few nuggets of info that did make it worth my while however – notably the risks firms are facing but have no idea about, from data breaches through P2P networks.

"No problem, got that covered," you may say. Ahhhh, but did you think of that contract worker who has been doing some work for your company, and has taken some of it home with him. No? Well, his home PC is also home to his kids' Kazaa P2P app, and the next time they search for Madonna's greatest hits on it, someone could be searching through all those sensitive documents he took away. D'oh!

Well, that's what Howard Schmidt – former White House cyber-security advisor – said, and I'm not one to argue with a man whose former job title included the word "cyber" – think I was traumatised by Dr Who as a child perhaps. Schmidt didn't offer much more advice to firms other than to monitor file-sharing networks to ensure you know what, if any, of your corporate data has been half inched. But then knowing where you stand from a corporate risk point of view is half the battle I suppose. And he also encouraged IT security bods to keep one eye on the whole supply chain, one eye on the enterprise, and another eye on... oh, forget it.

June 21, 2006 in Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (0)

Well Bill "badboy" Gates is finally calling it a day, hanging up the Farrah slacks and polyester pullover, and focusing his freakish superbrain on charidee work. Poor old Bill - or rather rich-on-an-unprecedented-scale, middle-aged Bill - it can't have been easy being one of the most powerful people on the planet. But it's pretty obvious his shadow will loom large over the IT industry for many decades to come.

And it's fitting that BG has decided on a slow but steady transition over two years, rather than going out in a blaze of glory. Never one for fanfares, our Bill. I had the pleasure of attending one of his last major public speeches before the announcement and I can honestly say it was one of the dullest I have ever had the misfortune to sit - slumped with my head in my hands - through. And I have sat through my fair share of mind-numbingly tedious speeches, from Tokyo to the Tyne. Oh yes.

I'm sure the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation will keep him out of trouble in the coming years, but we wouldn't want to see Bill shuffling around his house on a weekday morning with nothing to do. Might I suggest a hobby or two to keep the mind active and fill that Microsoft-sized hole in his life? Dominoes perhaps, or draughts... might even make some new friends

June 19, 2006 in Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (0)

I may have only been in this job for one year, five months, two days and nine hours, or thereabouts, but it's sometimes hard not to succumb to that age-old journalistic trait of pure, unadulterated cynicism. It's not entirely unprovoked, by the way, this peculiarity of our profession. Witness the first three emails in my inbox this morning: IM security vendor warns that IM threats are increasing to dangerous new highs; website performance is below par in 80 percent of sites, says site performance acceleration specialist; use Google Spreadsheets and your hair will fall out, says Microsoft - alright, I made that last one up.

However, one of the few opportunities I've had to shake off the shackles of my unrelenting pessimism was when I covered a recent story about Barclays Bank's decision to stump up for web security software for all its online customers. That's all it's customers, and for two years as well - more than a facile PR campaign this. Well, even if it is, I don't care because I'm a customer and I think it's a pretty good deal actually. As far as I know none of the other big high street names are doing similar things, though it surely won't be long before they follow suit.

The reason why this news gave me reason for renewed optimism is that it showed that these large, faceless and slightly intimidating organisations do sometimes get it right. Barclays' online division decided not to bully its customers into getting up to date on their web security by abnegating all financial responsibility for any fraud resulting from non-secure home PCs, though it could have done. No, it realised that the cost of around a million two-year F-Secure Anti Virus licenses was an acceptable one in the scheme of things, that it was great PR, and would go some way to reducing online fraud among its customers. All the more refreshing too, because banks tend to move about as quickly as a geriatric tortoise when it comes to innovation. But I wouldn't hold your breath waiting for them to roll-out two-factor authentication for online customers.

June 16, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (0)

If there's one thing we can all take for granted in this crazy mixed-up world we live in – apart from the fact that I won't win the IT Week World Cup sweepstake (I plucked Switzerland from the hat, since you ask, which was two quid well spent) – it's that we'll all get old, grey and infirm eventually. And, worst-case scenario, suffer from a touch of incontinence, cataracts, and a dodgy ticker. Another thing that may happen, of course, is that your once sharp-as-a-dandy's-'whistle-and-toot' brain comes to resemble that of a Big Brother contestant. Well, there is an answer from across the globe... maybe.

A new invention from Japan - you know you want to read more when you see that – promises to exercise your brain and stave off the inevitable. Nintendo, Sony, Namco: all the big boys are cashing in with a new selection of video games designed for OAPs, and with good reason too. In a country that is slowly turning into the demographic equivalent of Eastbourne, the grey yen is worth quite a lot. With the lure of eternal youth, or at least turning the mental clock back a few months, they're lapping it up in the land of the rising Stannah stairlift.

One of the most popular is Dr Kawashima's Brain Training from Nintendo, and the firm has shifted well over two million copies of this mental awareness and memory enhancing game in Japan.

The speed at which you complete the series of arithmetic, reading and memory tests enables the game to calculate your brain age, according to Nintendo, and as if one cult Japanese invention wasn't enough there's also a version of Sudoku included. So next time your brain goes blank when you're trying to remember your password, or that meeting with the CIO slips your mind, don't say I didn't warn you.

And for those cynics among you, Dr Kawashima is actually top brain expert (despite being rendered in the game in cartoon form, which slightly undermines his gravitas) so you'll be in good hands.

June 13, 2006 in Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (0)

Women in IT, eh? Not many, are there? It's enough to make you think there's a conspiracy going on. However, the more mundane reality is that most girls of school-leaving age just don't find a career in servers, switches and front-end buses particularly attractive. Can't think why. But the irony is, and oh what an irony, IT jobs today are increasingly crying out for the kind of "soft skills" that women apparently excel at. Which I personally find quite offensive; it implies that most men in IT are social misfits unable to interact with anything with a pulse. As if.

And as for resources for those women who ignored their peers and took the plunge into techie-land... I saw an advert pasted to the side of a London bus the other day, hoping to alert people to a newish web portal called Women in Technology. This site features job listings and careers advice and lots of pictures of odd looking women with fixed grins. Good effort on the advertising front, but a six foot poster of a pretty young girl posing with a laptop on her, erm, lap is perhaps not the best way to advertise you wares for this kind of thing. I don’t know how many casual observers would be interested in it but some more targeted advertising would better fit the bill I reckon - perhaps in the IT press, say?

June 9, 2006 in Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (0)

Given the obscene amounts of money on offer to firms who can get their internet marketing and retailing strategies sorted, I'm quite surprised that the music industry has thus far responded so sluggishly. After the success of the Arctic Monkeys and Gnarls Barkley though, the heads seem to be well and truly out of the sand in music land. Scottish "rock chick" Sandi Thom – as if the world needed another Joss Stone look- and sound-a-like – is the latest nobody to have rocketed to semi-stardom on the back of a canny PR campaign which made full use of the net as a marketing tool and virtual performance space, all in a very Web 2.0 kinda way.

The story, spun however it was by Quite Great PR, went something like this. Ms Thom, fed up with lukewarm audience receptions up and down the land to her brand of middle-of-the-road rock, and her erratic touring vehicle, decided to tout her wares via a series of webcast concerts broadcast live from her basement flat in Tooting. And lo and behold, she found an audience, probably attracted by the fact that they didn't have to travel an hour to a venue, stand behind the tallest person in the auditorium and breathe in second-hand smoke for two hours. Or it may have been that they liked the fact that they could switch off the PC and make a cup of tea when they got fed up with the music. Whatever the reasons, or the PR hype machine, or the alleged extensive advertising on MySpace, sending a million e-flyers and targeting the student press, the audience figures are pretty impressive – anywhere from 70,000 to over 100,000 depending on what papers you read.

There have been various efforts to discredit this rags to e-riches story, including the accusation in one broadsheet that she couldn't possible have supported the 70,000-plus high-bandwidth streams running concurrently that would have been necessary to claim such audience figures. Well, actually this little job was done by specialist streaming company Streaming Tank. But a word of advice to anyone hoping to emulate the girl from Banff – once the novelty has worn off and webcast concerts become more commonplace, it's going to get very hard to make your voice stand out from the crowd – without some expensive PR. Watch out for thousands of wannabes following suit over the coming months.

June 7, 2006 in Music | Permalink | Comments (0)

So the good ol' BBC is set to show all World Cup matches online, or at least that's the plan. And surprise surprise, the network vendors are already coming out in force with various words of wisdom and fearful warnings of downtime and productivity losses. There's usually about a half-day window when an announcement like this is made before interested vendors wade-in with over-reactive comments – even basic decency did not stop certain parties trying to spin the events of 7 July 2005 for commercial gain.

Apparently the BBC announcement could cause IT managers big headaches over bandwidth if employees decide to make use of the service while at work. Personally, I reckon it may never get to that stage... considering that most large media firms still seem incapable of coping with surges in demand for their online services at the busiest times. Try getting anything out of the BBC or Sky News online the next time there has been a major "news event" and you'll know what I mean.

But just supposing the BBC has sorted out these reliability issues, we'll probably see a fair number of firms limiting or banning streaming broadcasts over their networks. Not content with working the longest and hardest hours in Europe, no doubt we will deny our workforce the chance to see their team play in the greatest sporting event on the planet – quelle surprise.

They might as well put a chain around our necks and be done with it.

June 5, 2006 in Television | Permalink | Comments (0)

And now back to my favourite topic... foreign trips and freebies. Despite the biting-the-hand-that-feeds-me rhetoric of a few days ago detailing the ups and many downs of business trips, they can be a perk. There are as always, though, a myriad factors that can make the difference between those few days out of the office turning into a living hell, or a pure joy.

They include, in no order of importance, your fellow business travellers – a potential minefield here and in the case of a press trip, dangerously this factor will generally be revealed to you only in the airport lounge. The party can range from a group of like-minded, affable individuals who are up for a laugh and a few drinks at the end of the day to an obscenely unpleasant pair of blaggers who have become obsessed with their own self-importance and can instantly make everyone in the room want to wipe the smug grins off their faces with a large shovel... for example.

Choice of airline was never an issue for me, until my experience with the great AA, but I realise now it could be a deal breaker. And news... yes we do also have to work for our air miles, and for that reason, having some actual news to report from an event can make life a lot easier. The shame of returning to the office empty-handed from a trip that has entirely failed to live up to its PR billing can surely only be matched by the Aussie's ignominious homecoming after their Ashes defeat. Of course I can't speak for all my colleagues.

Finally, it obviously helps if a business trip includes a perk or two. But as I found out today after a straw poll of IT Week editorial staff, the chance to see Bon Jovi play live at the Coventry Arena is probably a non-starter.

June 2, 2006 in Travel | Permalink | Comments (0)

Picking up an old copy of IT Week recently I realised much of my time here is spent on stories that were probably knocking around in a not too dissimilar form about 10 years ago, at which time I was embarking on a fun-filled year out involving data-entry jobs, drinking too much and falling over in dodgy nightclubs.

At that time my esteemed colleagues were all fuller of hair and thinner of face. At least I think it was my colleagues who wrote those articles – their photos in the archive all have a curious yellow tinge that makes the entire editorial staff look jaundiced. I blame the printers, or the IT Week coffee machine. Even after barely a year and a half – yes, time flies when you're writing for IT decision-makers – I've worked through my fair share of these: outsourcing versus insourcing, or hosted versus client/server, and then there's that perennial favourite; skills shortages.

Of course, all these issues are cyclical to an extent, but on the skills front there are probably a few other long-term factors that should worry anyone looking to the future of IT. One which might have some weight is that the current trend for outsourcing could be reducing the talent-pool at home. We're going too far towards Chelsea, the argument goes – buying our way to success, without paying attention to the grass roots. And much as I'm loathe to admit it, the Man U model is probably better in the long run.

Then there has been endless debate about the why's and how's of getting more children interested in IT, and especially young women, to redress the balance in what is still a ridiculously male-dominated industry. Better technology teaching would certainly help, but how can we stimulate young minds in a way that, at present, IT just doesn’t really? He might do a lot of work for charidee, but old Bill Gates is hardly a sexy young role-model for kids, is he? Then there is software developer and model Mikey, currently seen trying to impregnate anything with a pulse on Big Brother, although he might not have the staying power required to lead the PR charge.

Whatever, current efforts at attracting kids into IT are pretty dire. Maybe we should just tell them the truth. After all, how can you compete with the dreams of walking out in front of 90,000 at Wembley? Yes kids, you will probably be shunned at school by all the cool kids if you take an interest in computer programming, but it's an interesting, fast-moving industry, you've got as good a chance as any career these days of job stability and, most importantly, the pay ain't bad.

A case in point: my mate got a call the other night as we were enjoying some after-work refreshments. Turns out there was a problem with the IT system and he was on call so off he went up the road to fix it. I had barely got served at the bar before he was back again, a couple of hundred quid in his pocket – not a bad night's work.

I'm still waiting for the phone to ring... "It's an emergency Phil! We need 300 words on hosted CRM, name your price!"

June 1, 2006 in Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (0)